I come from a long line of addicts. Most of whom don’t believe they’re addicts. I am the weird one; the outcast; the goody two-shoes; the judgmental one.
It’s incredibly hard loving an addict. You want to so badly to fix them; you want them to see how they are hurting themselves and others; you see the cycle of addiction and codependency; the cycle of children being forced to grow up; the selfish choices and harsh demands. It breaks your heart. And when it’s someone you love, it fractures not only your heart but your very person.
The way I have been able to get through this – get through loving someone with addiction – is by loving Christ. It’s reminding myself that God is in control. It’s His role to save, to redeem, and to resurrect. It’s putting my faith and hope in Christ because in man you will surely be disappointed – and oh, disappointment is a well known friend with addiction. It’s praying, a lot. It’s thanking God that He has given you eyes to see and the ability to stop the cycle of addiction in your life, and hopefully,one day in your own family. It’s allowing yourself to grieve because God is grieving with you.
Anyways that is some of what I’ve learned in my thirty years of living.
I also wanted to share the video below. It’s a great addition to the addiction knowledge bank. It helps to understand addiction when loving an addict.
My two cents: As humans we crave relationships since we are formed in the image of God who is eternally in relationship (Trinity). We have a craving that only God will satiate, but we go to heroin, social media, pornography, food, shopping, etc., instead of our Creator. In this era, we are more disconnected from people than ever. It’s no wonder addiction is so pervasive. Simply put, we need God and we need each other.